My Own Little Trauma
|
| |
General | |
|---|---|
| Title |
My Own Little Trauma |
| Japanese title |
私自身の小さな外傷 |
| French title |
Mon Propre Petit Traumatisme |
Identification codes? | |
| LIC |
12FR-181231-00972 |
| LIN |
「599 276 703」 |
| IMIC |
12FR-NYN8937-181231-001121 |
Global information | |
| Vocals |
Xin Hua Power |
| Air dates |
December 31, 2018 |
| Duration |
5:18 |
| Season |
4 |
| Tempo |
140 |
| Age rating (2018 letter system)? |
M14 |
| Content warnings? |
SM-02 |
| Music genres |
Trance |
Album information | |
| Album |
Psycho Ending |
| Track number |
1 |
Internal informations | |
| Licensing version |
18.0 |
| Music software with version |
FL Studio 20.1.1 |
| Known music plugins |
Xpand!2, FL Keys, Toxic Biohazard |
| Mastering and effects plugins |
|
| Eligibility to commercial license |
No |
| Quality range? |
0.8 |
Analysis results | |
| Blaster results? |
0 |
| Known results (sensibility)? |
None |
| Platform restrictions |
piapro (forbidden) |
| AHF ? |
Safe |
| AS ? |
Negative |
Links | |
| External links | |
 | The song is rated as being mature for the following reasons: yandere and yangire content. Please proceed with precaution. |
My Own Little Trauma is an original song featuring Xin Hua Power released on December 31, 2018. It is part of the album Psycho Ending and is part of the Corruption series.
Background
My Own Little Trauma is the third song to have been composed for the Corruption series, and is the first one to be on Xin Hua's point of view.
It directly follows Walking Towards a Dead Door performed by Kizuna Akari, who was a warning given to Xin Hua to not come to her masteress's home if she wanted to remain sane. The events of the song happen on the night between December 24 and 25, 2018.
At start, Xin Hua is first invited to a little home in the woods near the producer's castle, where she finds a photo of two people being happy together. The two people were probably Yukari and kokone, who also waited a bit before coming to the producer. The others who had waited were very often alone (probably Lily, GUMI, Zunko and Xin Hua; by refering to real life events IA didn't wait at all and Akari was just on halt for 3 days). She then gains some hope and decides to break the curse surrounding the producer, and, not listening to the warning in Akari's letter, decides to come to the castle few days after her arrival.
Xin Hua then learns, as Akari did in Corruption Syndrome, all about the curse itself and the behavior of her comrades. She has the time to go to her room, before the producer comes back to her to ask her to sing. However, she snaps and infects Xin Hua, whose hopes get all shattered.
The reason why the infection was considered as sudden is that, in the series, the corruptions are equivalent to yandere lyrics. The day after the unlock of Xin Hua's software by Nynthixia-P, a song with her was already released with yandere lyrics (Adele).
More information: Corruption series/Main timeline events#Xin Hua's infection.
Origins
When Walking Towards a Dead Door was created, it was intended since the beginning there would be a song answering to it. My Own Little Trauma was then predictable enough, and is the equivalent for Xin Hua of Corruption Syndrome.
Lyrics
 | Be cautious that DRYADE tools uses machine translation along with a human dictionary and the result may still contain mistakes, but their rate is reduced compared to former versions of the database. |
Japanese and romaji
| Japanese | Romaji |
|---|---|
| 庭から森に向かって去っていたよ | Niwa kara mori ni mukatte satte ita yo |
| 笑顔を見ていた、怖がっていなかった | Egao o mite ita, kowagatte inakatta |
| 森の中に残る幸せな思い出 | Mori no naka ni nokoru shiawasena omoide |
| 永遠に天国に行くている痛み | Eien ni tengoku ni ikute iru itami |
| あなたが何について話していたのか知っていくよ | Anata ga nani ni tsuite hanashite ita no ka shitte iku yo |
| でも、それほど問題ではないかもしれなかっただね | Demo, sorehodo mondaide wanai kamo shirenakatta da ne |
| 多分誰かが風中の脅威を免れるでしょう | Tabun darekaga kaze naka no kyōi o manukareru deshou |
| ここに来るとき強くとどまることを試みていく | Koko ni kuru toki tsuyoku todomaru koto o kokoromite iku |
| たとえ三人が生きたとしても、二人の少女はすでに脱出した | Tatoe sannin ga ikita to shite mo, futari no shōjo wa sudeni dasshutsu shita |
| 素敵な少女はどのようにして誰かを傷つけることができてるの？ | Sutekina shōjo wa dono yō ni shite dareka o kizutsukeru koto ga dekiteru no? |
| 信じることができる限り、呪いは永遠に続くことはないでしょう | Shinjiru koto ga dekiru kagiri, noroi wa eien ni tsuzuku koto wanai deshou |
| 結局、すでに一度他の誰かに逃げた、なぜ二度ではないでしょうの？ | Kekkyoku, sudeni ichido hoka no dareka ni nigeta, naze nido de wanai deshou no? |
| La la la... | Ra ra ra... |
| ここに来る前に数日間待った | Koko ni kuru mae ni sūjitsukan matta |
| 全ての隠された真実を学びた | Subete no kakusareta shinjitsu o manabita |
| 絶望に陥らないことを約束して | Zetsubō ni ochīranai koto o yakusoku shite |
| 世界にはまだ希望が残っている | Sekai ni wa mada kibō ga nokotte iru |
| あなたが何について話していたのか知っていくよ | Anata ga nani ni tsuite hanashite ita no ka shitte iku yo |
| でも、それほど問題ではないかもしれなかっただね | Demo, sorehodo mondaide wanai kamo shirenakatta da ne |
| 多分誰かが風中の脅威を免れるでしょう | Tabun darekaga kaze naka no kyōi o manukareru deshou |
| ここに来るとき強くとどまることを試みていく | Koko ni kuru toki tsuyoku todomaru koto o kokoromite iku |
| 彼女は本当に私に幸せを感じていた | Kanojo wa hontōni watashi ni shiawase o kanjite ita |
| 何も意味がなかった少しとわずかな笑いだよね | Nani mo imi ga nakatta sukoshi to wazukana warai da yo ne |
| 痛みが急に来た、それが来るのを見なかっていたよ | Itami ga kyū ni kita, sore ga kuru no o minakatte ita yo |
| それから彼女は 「私のために歌って」と言ったね | Sorekara kanojo wa "atashi no tame ni utatte" to itta ne |
| この希望を信じることは間違い | Kono kibō o shinjiru koto wa machigai |
| 後悔して、とても後悔していく | Kōkai shite, totemo kōkai shite iku |
| できる間に逃げることができていたね | Dekiru ma ni nigeru koto ga dekite ita ne |
| 彼女は欲しいときにいつも捕まえて | Kanojo wa hoshī toki ni itsumo tsukamaete |
Original English and French adaptation
|
| English (original) | French (adaptation) |
|---|---|
| I went away from the garden towards the forest | Je suis partie du jardin en direction de la forêt |
| I saw their smiles, I wasn't scared | J'ai vu leurs sourires, je n'étais pas effrayée |
| Happy memories staying in the woods | Des souvenirs heureux restant dans les bois |
| Pain going to the heavens forever | La douleur partant de sorte à ce que personne ne la voie |
| I know what you were talking about | Je sais de quoi tu avais tenté de m'avertir |
| But it couldn't be that problematic, could be? | Mais ça ne pouvait pas être aussi pire que ça, pas vrai ? |
| Maybe someone will escape the threat in the air | Peut-être que quelqu'un échappera à la menace qui se fait ressentir |
| I'll try to stay strong when I'll come here | Je tenterai de rester forte lorsque je viendrai |
| Three girls already escaped this, even if two were alive | Trois filles ont déjà échappé à cette chose, et deux encore en vie |
| How can a nice woman hurt someone? | Comment une si gentille femme pourrait-elle vouloir du mal à quelqu'un ? |
| The curse won't be eternal as long I can believe | Tant que je continue de croire, la malédiction aura toujours une fin |
| After all, I already escaped to someone else once, so why not twice? | Après tout, j'ai déjà échappé à quelqu'un d'autre une fois, pourquoi pas une deuxième réussite ? |
| La la la... | |
| I waited for several days before coming here | J'ai attendu plusieurs jours avant de venir ici |
| I learnt all the hidden truth | J'ai appris toute la vérité cachée |
| I promise to not fall to despair | Je ne perdrai pas face au désespoir c'est promis |
| There is still some hope remaining in the world, right? | Il reste encore un peu d'espoir dans ce monde, pas vrai ? |
| I know what you were talking about | Je sais de quoi tu avais tenté de m'avertir |
| But it couldn't be that problematic, could be? | Mais ça ne pouvait pas être aussi pire que ça, pas vrai ? |
| Maybe someone will escape the threat in the air | Peut-être que quelqu'un échappera à la menace qui se fait ressentir |
| I'll try to stay strong when I'll come here | Je tenterai de rester forte lorsque je viendrai |
| She was really feeling happy with me | Elle semblait vraiment très heureuse à mes côtés |
| A slight and little laugh that didn't mean anything | Un rire léger et doux qui n'avait pas grande signification pour moi |
| Pain came so suddenly, I didn't see it coming | Je n'ai pas vu arriver la douleur si vite arrivée |
| Then she said "sing for me" | Ensuite elle m'a dit "chante pour moi" |
| Believing into this hope was a mistake | Croire en cet espoir était une trop grossière erreur |
| I regret, I regret so much | Je regrette, mais je regrette tellement |
| I could have run away while I could | J'aurais pu m'enfuir tant que je le pouvais cependant |
| But she always catches you when she wants | Quand elle te veut, elle t'attache à jamais à son cœur |
Trivia
- While Xin Hua is saying 私 as わたし watashi, Nynthixia seems to pronunce it as あたし atashi, which is considered as a more feminine singular first person.
- There are many references to real life events in the song:
- The wait in the forest is because Xin Hua was actually a Christmas present of the producer for 2018. She arrived few days before.
- The three girls Xin Hua is talking about in the song are Hachi, Midori and Aika (the two still "alive").
- When Xin Hua says she escaped someone else, it is because when Nynthixia purchased her software, it was marked as "used - as new". But by seeing the picture of the DVD posted on her blog, the package seemed to be untouched.
- This is the first test with the Power voicebank made by Nynthixia-P, saying that she sounded less childish than her Natural voicebank.
- The unnatural screams are a reference to the corruption itself, the song having "many symbolics".
- In Corruption Syndrome, Akari screamed of pain instead.
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